Navigating through a divorce is hard because there are a lot of legal ramifications on top of tender emotions and confusion. Women may not know the right route to take or advice that is right for them. Questions from “how long do you have to be married to get alimony?” to “how do I navigate through custody negotiations?” can seem daunting.
While the process will undoubtedly be unpleasant in some ways, there are some things you can do to help to reduce the unpleasantness as much as possible. Here are some top tips to help you navigate through this difficult time.
Cooperation
It can be easy to fall into the pattern of confrontation about everything with your soon-to-be-ex. There are a lot of hurt feelings surrounding the ending of a relationship, and that can lead to anger and lashing out.
The faster the divorce case is over, the sooner everyone can get on to healing and moving forward. The more that you can be reasonable and cooperate, the faster you can get through it. While you still need to set healthy boundaries, working through issues with a sense of cooperation and finding a compromise will help both people get more of what they want.
Children
If there are children involved in this process, it is important to remember to protect them. They are confused and hurt just as much as you are, and they may not understand everything that is going on. Support them in their feelings and protect them from unpleasantness as much as possible. You should never use your children as leverage or make them pick sides.
While custody agreements are being worked out, it is also important that children see both of their parents. Communicating openly about when and where visits will happen will help to calm any frazzled nerves and will help later negotiations go smoother.
Be Honest
A court can throw out a case ruling if there are inconsistencies noted afterward. It is important that you are fully honest about all your assets and properties when you are going through the process. You don’t want dishonesty that you thought wasn’t going to be discovered to reopen old wounds.
Be Informed
Depending on your specific circumstances, you may not even need a divorce. Other options like an annulment, legal separation, or summary dissolution might work better and be faster for your situation. You should know all your options and choose the one that will be best for you and your family.
Research
Each state has different laws surrounding divorce, so another person’s experience may be very different from your own. This is also amplified because each situation is so different. You will need to do plenty of research to know where you need to file for divorce and to know the proper forms that you need to fill out. You also need to understand laws regarding child custody, child support, spousal support, and the process for the divorce trial.
Lawyer
You probably shouldn’t try to navigate through this alone. Finding a good lawyer will ensure that you know all of your options and move through the process as quickly and smoothly as possible. Your lawyer will also be able to answer all questions that you have about the process so you don’t feel out of control in the situation.
You want to make sure you find a lawyer that can help you in your specific situation. Make sure that they have a lot of experience working on cases that are similar to your own. You also want to make sure that they have good reviews from former clients. You not only want them to have experience, but you also want them to communicate with you clearly through the process.
Take Care of Yourself
This is a hard process, so you need to make sure that you are taking care of yourself. You should have a good support system in place of people who are supportive that you can talk to when you feel overwhelmed. In addition to friends and family members, you should probably talk to a therapist. They can offer an unbiased opinion about your situation and offer coping mechanisms to help you through it.
You should take care of your body by getting sleep, drinking plenty of water, and eating good foods. You should also work to get physical exercise. You will be much more likely to make it through this process if you are giving your body and your emotions what they need.
